How My Daughter Chose
Charlotte Mason
"There is no education but self-education and
only as the young student works with his own mind
is anything effected."
~Charlotte Mason
My daughter, Isabel, is amazing: amazingly bright, amazingly talented and…amazingly assertive. All such incredible qualities to possess. Yet, I have to be honest and say that they can also be a bit challenging when you’re trying to teach a person with such attributes.
Ever since she was a toddler, my daughter knew what she wanted. If it came to choosing one item to buy, she’d look around for a minute or two and quickly decide. No matter how much I tried to convince her to get something else, she’d still go with the first decision she made. When she was in Pre-K, her teacher would tell me that she’d play nicely with all her classmates. However, if she was engaged in an activity and her friends moved on to something else, she’d stay until she was done, even if that meant she was the only one left. That’s my girl.
Most people tell me those are wonderful characteristics to have because in the future, she won’t be swayed by the masses. Hey, I totally get it. She has great leadership qualities. And I’m grateful for her assertiveness and determination. Here’s the thing though. When I’m trying to get a lesson done with her, and she wants to be the teacher making the decisions or do something else completely unrelated to school, then those amazing qualities become a bit challenging to appreciate.
As a result, the first 2 years of homeschooling were rough. First off, we didn’t start homeschooling until 2nd grade. (BIG mistake but that’ll be another blog post.) Then all she wanted to do was play…like every waking moment. And, as to be expected, there were the MANY power struggles. I’ll save you all the details but the power struggles were real and, unfortunately, they were constant.
So after shedding many tears in private, after I was depleted of almost all my joy for homeschooling, and after all the arguing (yes, I got sucked into arguing with a 7 year old–definitely, not proud “mommy moments”), I finally did what I should’ve done in the first place: I prayed. Seems like a given for any Christian, right? But when you’re in the thick of it, sometimes you forget to go back to the basics.
So I prayed and asked my Heavenly Father for direction. He was the one who had called me to homeschool. Therefore, I knew He had a plan for us…but what was it?! So I begged Him for help, to lead me in how to teach His precious daughter who He specifically placed in my care. Then I ended my prayer, wiped away the tears, and went about my day.
The answer to my cry wasn’t an overnight one. It wasn’t even just one answer. It was multifaceted and over a period of time. But since this is a blog on Charlotte Mason, I’ll focus on this particular answer to my prayer.
Being first-time homeschoolers, we began meeting other families as we joined a couple of nature groups. In making new friends, a few moms in particular started to share Charlotte Mason’s educational philosophy with me. They mentioned simple truths such as:
Children are born persons, not blank slates, who the Holy Spirit Himself speaks to, even now in their young age.
Teachers should talk less and do more guiding so students can learn more independently.
Students need to be allowed to take more ownership of their education.
Children should have hours of outdoor play and discovery.
Learning handicrafts leads to life skills.
The more they shared, the more I knew God was answering my cry for help because He was providing a Biblical educational philosophy that spoke directly to my daughter’s heart and to her unique design.
Miss Mason writes in Vol 3:
“…let them get at the books themselves, and do not let them be flooded with a warm diluent at the lips of their teacher. The teacher’s business is to indicate, stimulate, direct and constrain to the acquirement of knowledge . . . The less parents and teachers talk-in and expound their rations of knowledge and thought to the children they are educating, the better for the children.”
When I read this quote, I was like: “OMG! Charlotte Mason knows my child!” Isabel was busy playing during all the CM conversations, but had she overheard any of them, I’m sure she would’ve said, “Mami, I want to do school like that!”
Miss Mason forced me to look at my daughter’s desire for independence differently. Instead of viewing it as a challenge or push back, I started to pull back, giving more choice and less direction within the lessons I prepared for her. What happened as a result was pretty miraculous. One miracle was less opposition from my daughter (THANK YOU JESUS!). The other miracle was that instead of giving me okay school work coupled with tons of complaints, Isabel began producing masterpieces, from artwork to writing, all on her own. She actually produced more quality work when I stood in the background as a guide and support. Go figure.
If there were ever any doubts that a CM education was the route for our family, they dissipated as I watched Isabel thrive independently and be led by the Holy Spirit. Peace began to fill our home. So though she doesn’t know it, my daughter chose Charlotte Mason for our homeschool, and it’s only getting better for us in this living journey. 
This is an amazing story. I believe my children are leading me in the same direction.
Thank you Ana! I’m excited to be on this journey with you!
I swear, our girls are so similar. I love your honesty, Erika. I look forward to learning more about your journey with CM.
Thank you so much for your encouragement Angelia! I’m so glad we get to spur one another on in our callings!
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